Relax. It’s Only Soccer

I am always intrigued by conservatives whining about soccer as though it’s a diseased illegal alien only Democrats want within our borders.

It’s a game. Games are won on something conservatives like: merit.

Why liberals even like it is an unknown — someone actually – gasp – LOSES!! Think of the loss of self-esteem!! And the competitions are based on – OMG – Nationalism!!!

Sometimes it’s competition with the ball & sometimes, like the Oscars, it’s won by the best performance of a player in an injury role. Maybe this is why Democrats like it?

To me soccer is some weird game not allowing the use of what separates us from dumb animals (thumbs & articulating hands). Maybe that’s also why Libs like it?

But, sheesh! Lighten up! It’s players out there busting their asses to be the best they can be, trying win within a set of rules, rain or shine competing for personal & national greatness.

Why would conservatives have a problem with that?

(OTOH why would Libs LIKE it?)

So it’s from Europe? So? So is the English language conservatives demand be OUR national language.

Europeans beat us in soccer. Is that why conservatives hate it? NEWSFLASH: we beat Europeans in war. Every time. And baseball. And basketball. And track & field…

Europeans (and others) gloat that their athletes are better & that’s why they win & we don’t. So? When you’re second-best you need to gloat about SOMETHING!

Does any conservative really think that if America’s best, strongest, fastest & most agile open field athletes played soccer instead of roamed the defensive backfield of the NFL that ANYONE could beat us? Of course not.

Soccer need not be that national pastime (baseball). It need not be the first choice of most Americans (football). It need not be the coming thing – faster than baseball, not as injury-probe as football & way faster than soccer: lacrosse (a totally American sport).

But it delivers on everything conservatives demand: Excellence. Competition. Nationalism.

So lighten up. Enjoy the competition. Marvel at the hard-sought personal capabilities. Be appreciative of the hard work of these athletes.

But relax. It’s not a threat to your country or manhood. It’s just a game.

About Alex Scipio

About Alex Scipio: Alex moved out of the People's Republic of California to the Free State of Arizona, finally tiring of the lack of the Bill of Rights, the overgrown idiocracy, and the catering to non-Americans & welfare recipients. He still wonders how America got from Truman, Eisenhower, and Daniel Patrick Moynihan to the Liberal and Conservative extremes so badly managing America today. And, yes, islam DOES need to be annihilated. And doing what he can to get folks away from the extremes of political life.
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